I would love to say that I am able to jump in my car head over to a restaurant eat a good meal, and then take in a good movie. Well I am not really that easy going. I find that I have issues with myself being in public where families, couples, friends all go.
When I was younger, I would look at single folks coming to functions as odd. How sad it would be to not have someone to enjoy things with. Now I am at the age of who gives a damn. I have started to see the flaws in my previous thoughts and when my friends couldn’t join me for a marathon over the weekend, I came up with reasons to get out of it. Then the day came for the race and I realized I will be alone at some point so push through it and go. I looked like a fish out of water as there were groups and some with another. Here I was looking out of place, but I push through. I had strangers take a couple of pictures so I could commemorate the event, realize I didn’t die, but thought it would have been a bit more fun with a friend or two. Next time. This is the first step to knowing I can go out and not feel so self-conscious, I will say I want to never be alone as a general choice.
Can we as humans live alone, no. Can we as humans be so needed that we can’t do one thing alone, I want to say no, I am sure some people feel this way. Let us all find a happy balance. Not being able to do things alone is as much of a problem as not wanting to be around other people. Either stance means you need to learn about yourself, how to enjoy others and yourself. I am comfortable in my own skin and being alone, I am now learning I don’t need to be with someone to go out and have fun, I don’t need to wait for another person to join me.
I will say I still enjoy company but won’t die if I do things out and about alone. I am and will always be a work in progress but in the meantime, I am going to do another 5k alone, if no one else can join. Enjoy finding your own company worth the time to work on.